The crying of lot 49 (part II)

As I’m finishing the book and I’m about to put it down I am left with a thousand questions, in the middle of my confusion, once again, I go to my last resource “sparknotes.com” I read the chapter summaries, but when I’m about to read chapter 6’s summary I decide to read it from the book one more time. I am more confused than ever, well at this point I’m not sure if I’m confused or I can’t process the end…

All this reading for such an end… we are left with such a big question??? Who was the crier??? Oedipa went through this entire journey, she was about to lose it, and when she finally thought she found a final answer, when she was about to reach the light at the end of the tunnel, she’s wrapped in another mystery…who is the damn crier?? He or she has all the answers she’s been looking for.

I think in the end all the people she trusted and tried to help her knew who the crier was, they knew all the answers; however this was something she had to go through and solve by herself. They played with her and I think it was all Pierce’s plan. I don’t even think he’s dead. I admire her for not losing it; she kept herself together even though she stumbled towards the end. She found out about the auction and goes…and that’s where the story ends with a thousand questions in the reader’s mind.

The crying...

Pynchon’s “The crying of lot 49” is amazing!! I don’t regret voting for this novel, I love, love the way Pynchon writes. The way he describes things and the plot is super interesting, I can’t wait to finish the book.  The most thrilling part is the plot!! Oedipa is one lucky bi***!! She inherited all of Pierce’s estate. I would love to have an ex-boyfriend like that J soon we find out that his estate is very complex and the journey she’s about to adventure is a lot more interesting than we think.

The symbols Pynchon’s uses seem so appealing, the letters, the lovers, the lyrics, the whole Rapunzel metaphor, the horn trumpet like symbol. It looks like everything is related but at the same time it’s not or at least not yet. Oedipa doesn’t give a crap of what she has to do to solve the mystery of Pierce’s will and his affairs, even if she has to act like a slut, and she really doesn’t have to but at least she enjoys it haha. Mucho seems like a very  boring husband, but he’s very supportive (kudos for that!) she has no remorse for having sex with Metzger.

As I kept reading, the story became more difficult to understand. I have to admit I read each page at least twice and I used sparknotes (busted!) so I could at least make it through each chapter. I’m very thrilled to see what’s coming next and see how the story ends.

Group discussion...

I have to admit I didn’t do much research for this reading, other than the usual. A small browsing session on Wikipedia and I also read the story twice. In fact I even forgot to answer some of the questions from the handout. I only focused on the ones I found more interesting and just my luck I didn’t answer any of them during the group discussion.

I learned a lot from my classmates’ points of view. It’s nice to give feedback, discuss and exchange ideas, maybe they caught something I didn’t or vice versa. However I like it more when the teacher leads the class. I felt like the mediator didn’t know much of what we were talking about because he didn’t read the story. Some people can be really shy or they can get scared when they’re put on the spotlight. I felt like it should have been a more free or voluntarily discussion. The pressure of having to answer certain questions made me feel very nervous I almost froze when it was my turn.

I really think we learn a lot more as a class and not as separate teams. I felt like some of my teammates had a lot to say but we had to follow the handout. When the mediator started asking the questions from the handout, I was like “Crap! I didn’t write any answers down” I looked for the answers as I was reading along but I didn’t write anything down, so I had a hard time formulating proper answers and then when I wanted to say something it was time to move to the next question. I kept looking at the clock waiting for the Inquisition to be over, that’s how I actually felt. I’m really looking forward to going back to our “normal” class this Friday.    =)

Notes from a Native Son...

I must have to say that I love this reading so much! None of the stories I’ve read so far during the semester have made such an impact on me. “Notes of a Native Son” from James Baldwin is an exquisite piece of art, such a great and detailed essay. I loved it from the first to the last word. The way he relates his relationship with his father, the way death and life came together and his internal fight is exquisite.

I like the way he says “In his outrageously demanding and protective way he loved his children…” This line struck me so much; it reminded me so much of my father. He, just like Baldwin’s dad, was a man of few words. When you grow up with such a father figure you tend to blame his authoritarian attitude to the life experiences he lived before he became a father. You look for a way to justify their hate and resentment.

Having to deal with his father sickness and death without feeling sad about it must have been very difficult to share, but in the end he wished he had one more minute with his dad. His dad died without creating a loving bond with him, that’s the reason why he didn’t feel sad about his death. It must have been so hard to realize he could have had a better relationship with him if his father had different ideals.  “All of my father’s texts and songs, which I had decided were meaningless, were arranged before me at his deathlike empty bottles, waiting to hold the meaning which life would give them to me”  

Like he said, “whiteness and blackness did not matter” it only matter that his dad was dead and with him his hate and resentment died too, the birth of little brother was a new beginning , a new chance to start from zero.

The Invisible Man

I really, really liked this story. The first paragraph really struck me. Every single word in the paragraph has a deep meaning; the author is narrating his struggle of being a black male. Since he was born he was an invisible man, yet he looked for answers and some kind of identity all his life. He says “I was naive, I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I, and only I, could answer…”

I’m assuming he knew these answers because of what he experienced growing up so he comes to the conclusion that he’s nothing but an “Invisible man” A man who was told he was free just like his ancestors did but he was oppressed and separated just like the rest of his fellow African Americans.  A follower of Mr Booker T. Washington, he wanted to pursue an academic career.

The part where he delivers his speech at the “smoker” was so sad, but I believe the author really portrayed the struggle of every single African American at the time. They were humiliated and treated like animals, no freedom, no rights. They were beaten and abused physically and emotionally. However they stood up and just like the Phoenix they rose from the ashes and prove that they can be more than just slaves. This young man, stood up, his weak and bloody body was not an excuse to deliver his speech, and he knew it was the right thing to do. His grandfather’s words were ringing in his head just like the bell announced the end of the fight. In the end he got a scholarship, it was his ticket to a better life. To me he was not invisible anymore…  

Say what...?

So far this has been one of the most difficult poems I have ever read in my entire life, it is super, extremely complicated!!

It is obvious that death and life after death as well as resurrection (?) play a big role in the poem, I can tell by the following lines:
“April is the cruelest month, breeding Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing memory and desire…”

“That corpse you planted last year in your garden, has it begun to sprout? Will it bloom this year?”

It reminded me when we’re burying my dad, I remember the grass was so green and flowers were in full bloom. I thought here I am burying my dad, his dead body in a land full of life. It was a mix of feelings.

One of the things I’ve always feared is water; it’s actually one of my biggest phobias. The sea, a lake, anything related with water freaks me out.  T.S. Elliot mentions water a lot throughout the poem and death by water.

One of the things we discussed in my group was that Nick was a soldier, something that I didn’t see when I first read the story. I got the feeling that he had gone fishing because he wanted to get away from something or someone. We came to the conclusion that he wanted to get away from himself and he also wanted to let go of something. He suffered from PTSD he saw war everywhere during his fishing trip.

On the other hand, Wright’s “Almos’ a man” was a lot easier to understand and analyze, something that we came to the conclusion that he left on the train because he already made a foul of himself there, he needed to get away in order to fit in. He needed to leave to prove the town’s people that he really was a man.

All stories are great, all three of them.